Politically Incorrect USA

Being Nice Is So Traumatic, It Makes Trump Forget How To Even Spell!

In the wake of massive counter-protests against the Boston white-supremacist rally, Trump ended his week of unbridled vitriol to attempt an offer of a few kind words. And that must have been one of the most traumatic parts of this disastrous week, because he couldn’t even spell that message correctly.

The “nicest” tweet in a week.

Trump barely bowed to massive public and political pressure, and plunging ratings from even his most ardent supporters, when he feigned condemnation of the lethal violence in Charlottesville. After a few prominent CEOs pulled out of his advisory councils, he viciously denounced them. But when every one of them turned against him, he may have finally gotten the message in the only language he really understands (Corporatese). So he tapped out the following conciliatory tweet.

Now just to be clear, my 7-year-old son only learned to read and write a year-and-a-half ago. I dictated this to him, and he spelled “heal” correctly. Both times.

Here’s how it probably went down

I imagine that being pushed up against his own “big, beautiful wall” of egomaniacal and authoritarian narcissism must have just been too traumatic for him to bear. And Mr. “I know words, I know the best words” blew a fuse. Or maybe he just never passed the 2nd grade.

Or, like the mysterious secret Confefe, maybe he really meant heel. “Heel,” as in dogs (or citizens in this case) rigorously trained to obediently and unquestionably following their masters every move.

Either way, some poor soul tasked with this watch of the 24-hour damage control squad rushed into the room, desperately wanting to shout “are you completely insane!?” But knowing that was already true, they begged our fake President to delete it and punch out a correction, and an even more conciliatory tweet to distract us.

Those had to be pre-written for him because they were made just seconds apart. Well played, anonymous staffers.

As Trump once said, “I think spelling has taken on a new significance.” Or as he always ends his tweets, “So sad!

Featured image from Flickr

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