NEW YORK: Goodyear Satire Co.–Donald Trump will be banned from America on Day One of his Presidency under new guidelines he announced today.
Trump pledged to stop immigration from “any nation that has been compromised by terrorism.” He did not immediately realize that includes the United States. America is a country with a long and difficult history of terrorist acts as well as a sizable Muslim population.
Trump expanded his ban from Muslims-Only to include a certain Protestant who lives in Trump Tower.
Active terrorist groups in America include anti-abortion, neo-Nazi and white supremacist groups, all of which support Trump.
Trump himself has advocated the use of violence to achieve political ends, the definition of terrorism. He has called for attacks on protesters and for “second amendment solutions” against his political opponents.
After Trump wins in November, he will be deported as soon as he takes the oath of office. He will not be allowed to return until a Democrat is elected to the presidency and birds sing again. Trump was philosophical about this turn of events. He said,
“My ban is a beautiful ban, a tremendous ban, and if it keeps out people like me, then it’s doing its job.”
Cover Photo and photo above Donald Trump By Gage Skidmore from Peoria, AZ, United States of America. (Flickr) via Wikimedia Commons